Shut-out

I can't help but feel like I'm being shut out by her yet again.  I know that I'm sincerely trying to be friends with her after all the drama went down and I truly do want to be friends because her husband and my boyfriend have been best friends for years.  I WANT to get along, but I feel like she's only "tolerating" me for the hell of it.  I tried to strike up a conversation and get ignored.  I know damn well she heard my voice when I asked her to come back and talk to me.  The baby monitor was on full volume down by her feet and I spoke right into it, hearing the echo of my voice down the hallway.  Her response was, "I barely heard you.  I thought you were talking to the baby."  Alright, being pregnant is the only thing letting you get away with being a smart ass.  If you would clear your act up, I might not feel so tempted to knock the piss out of you after you have the baby.

I shouldn't say that... no actually, I should.  This is my blog and I'm getting my feelings out.  It pisses me off when I try to be friends with someone after something stupid happens and they act so childish as to completely shut-out all attempts of me trying to be friendly.  I will give her credit though, her and her husband did come over tonight and eat with us.  I did manage to get a "thank you" out of her for giving her two maternity shirts that were once my own... one still with the tags.

It didn't help much that the two of us were a little irritated at the guys... I was especially.  She acted like it was nothing, but I could tell it was upsetting her.  Her husband acted like a complete ass and got my bf acting up just as bad.  So now, I have to stay up all night and make sure the baby doesn't wake up because I can't take my medicine to get some sleep.  My plan was to take an Ambien.  Did that happen? NO.  Why?  Because the a-hole over here snoring on the couch got so damn drunk, I don't think he could wake up if the baby did cry.  Not that he wakes up anyways.  It makes me mad that, while he was drunk (and in front of his friends, and I specifically say *HIS friends because she doesn't like me) he claimed that he woke up with the baby all of the time.  Umm... NO, I came in from doing my grocery shopping a few times and the baby is screaming bloody murder in the crib while he's fast asleep on the couch.  It would be one thing if he had spent all day dealing with screaming children and decided to let them scream it out and take a nap, but little David had been asleep and woke up (apparently not long after I left for the store) and had been screaming so long that his little face was red.  Drunk and showing off to his friends or not, PLEASE DON'T TAKE CREDIT FOR WHAT I DO.  He won't let me catch up on my sleep during the day, so I am completely exhausted to the point where I actually had to drink a cup of coffee just to get through supper with everyone tonight.  I was literally banging my head on the kitchen table 30 minutes before anyone got here because I was so tired and wondering why the hell I didn't just cancel.  I'm still tired, yet here I am, up at 2 am typing a fucking blog that hardly anyone reads.  I don't know if this is really worth it.  Maybe it is and I just don't recognize it.

I was put down tonight... I was put down bad while they were drunk.  Truth is, I wanted to ask them to leave, but didn't want to risk an argument with him.  I love him, but his friends can be downright twats sometimes.

I pulled out a blank canvas tonight, hoping to start a painting for our daughter.  She's so amazing.  I can't believe that she will be 4 in May.  I want to make something beautiful for her... something with butterflies.  She is my little butterfly.  I would do anything for my little girl. <3